When I first started this blog, I wasn't sure about posting EVERYTHING. I mean, I would post about cartooning for sure. And then I posted about my garden. And sometimes more personal things. This is one of those times. Well, really, the most personal.
My Mom died at the age of 85 on May 26, 2022. By a fortunate quirk of fate, I had just been out there to visit the week before. The memorial for her was this past weekend. My sister, Penny, gave a speech, and then I spoke. Here's what I said:
Thank you for coming. Thank you, Penny, for arranging this.
I am Barbara's son, Mike.
Like all of you, I wish she was here.
Dad:
It was very helpful to hear that you still have things that you'd like
to tell your mom, our Gramma. I live in a different state and didn't get
to see Mom very often, but we often talked on the phone.
Several times a day I think of something I would like to tell Mom about. Things like this:
Just
a week after she passed, I was driving in our town of Milton, NH and I
saw an eagle pluck a very surprised little fish out of the lake and fly
over the car.
We often talked about nature, birds, flowers, our garden...and I know she would have liked hearing about the bald eagle.
Speaking of hearing ...
Here are some expressions of Mom's I will miss hearing:
Michael! Don't egg on your sister!
Don't
get too close to the edge. We used to take camping vacations when Penny
and I were young and we were lucky enough to visit lots of national
parks and beautiful camping areas. But those camps came with peril:
there was always a cliff edge or steep hill that one false step might
send us toppling over. Luckily, Mom was always on watch and we're both
here to tell the tale - but I still worry about getting too close to the
edge.
I'll shoot you with my big fat knife.
This expression originated from her mother, my Grandma Powell, and was
used as a serious admonition to young Barbara. Try as Mom might though,
she could not say it without cracking herself up, since it made no
sense.
Junky lunch. Junky lunch was a quicky,
no-cook lunch involving whatever cold cuts, veggies and potato chips
were available, arranged artistically in the shape of a face. We loved
it.
I learned a lot being raised by Mom. Here are two lessons I want to share:
When
I was a little kid, I drew on the wall and got in trouble. Both of us, Mom and me, scrubbed the wall clean. She told me later that she realized
the wall IS a very good place to draw: it's big and clean. So, Mom
bought a roll of shelf paper and taped it to the floor so I could draw
on it. Sometimes we would tape a very long piece of this white shelf
paper in the breezeway and I would have a "drawing party" with my
friends. Mom realized how important drawing was to me and she made it
possible.
Later on, when I
was in 4th grade, I had to learn my times tables. I told my mom I
couldn't do it. She did not accept that. She went over and over the
times tables with me. There was no escaping the times tables at my house
when I was in the 4th grade. She would stick her head in my bedroom
door: "Four times six!" "Oh, Mom! It's 24!" The next day, we would be in
the grocery store: "Six times eight!" and I would whine but eventually
say "48."
I thought it was impossible. But
with persistence, and Mom's constant grilling me the times tables, I
learned it was NOT impossible. I could do things I didn't think I could.
Mom showed me how to see things in new ways. Not just possible, but with hard work, probable.
But
for today, I identify with that little fish plucked out of the lake --
looking all around -- confused and bewildered because my world is
suddenly different.
I love you Mom.
From the Dickens Funeral Home site:
Barbara F. Crow (nee Powell), 85, long time Bay Village resident,
died May 26, 2022. She was born December 19, 1936 in Hastings, MI.
Barbara retired as a computer field technician from NASA. She was a
member of John Knox Presbyterian Church, North Olmsted and was active
within the Bay Village Senior Center. She enjoyed bird watching, old
movies and traveling with her husband, Walter.
Barbara is survived by her daughter, Penny (Steve Ouellette) Lynch of
Elyria; son, Michael Dennis (Stacy) Lynch, Milton, NH; step children,
Christy, Barb, Brian and Debbie; a sister, Judy Chilson; and 2
grandchildren.
She was preceded in death by her husband Walter in 2014 and parents, Charles and Virginia (nee Coleman) Powell.
A memorial service will be Saturday, August 13, 2022 at 11:00 am at
John Knox Presbyterian Church, 25200 Lorain Road, North Olmsted 44070.
Burial will be in Lakewood Park Cemetery, Rocky River.
In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made to Doctors Without Borders.
5 comments:
My condolences to you and your family.
Thanks for sharing these lovely memories, Mike. My condolences.
Michael! Do NOT get egg on your sister!
That sure seems it could be a Dr. Seuss routine.
In memoriam I've upped my contribution to MSF. I'm glad you're getting to the point where you can talk about this now.
The shelf paper! May her memory be a blessing.
My thanks to all of you for the kind comments here. You guys are amazing. Thank you, thank you.
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